Funeral Expenses

Most of us, at some time in our lives, have had to face the passing away of a parent. We may have also had to arrange or actively participate in the funeral arrangements.

It would be usual for the sibling who looked after the parent to make the arrangements and if he or she is able to afford it to meet the initial expenses or bulk of the expenses or all of the expenses. I am aware of families who contribute specie at the behest of one family member. Where the sibling is unable to afford it, it would also be common for others to pool in, without any solicitation. In most or all cases the children of the siblings are always left out of decisions or the expenses thus depriving them from participating in the funeral arrangements of their grandparents. 

Here's an example of something that I did recently when my mother passed away. It is an idea, which you could consider. It was about participation of all, including nephews and nieces, and to one's best ability. 

My message was simple:

" Let us give ourselves the opportunity of sharing among us the funeral expenses of our dearly departed mother and grandmother.

For this purpose I have opened a sharing box in the ground floor of our house. It is a paperboard box with a slit at the top into which you may put cash notes, of any currency, any denomination, on the condition of anonymity.

Any coins found in the box will be buried in the backyard of our house.

Any cheques, demand drafts, certificates of deposits and monetary instruments other than cash will be returned or destroyed.

The undertakers bill which includes the crematorium charge amounts to the sum I have advised you. Any money collected in excess of this sum will be used to scatter the ashes and any remainder given to charity, of our choice"

Love

Post-scriptum: Sorry, these expenses will not be tax deductible in any jurisdiction

Post Post-scriptum: And, I am sure you will understand, respecting the spirit of this exercise, that there is no place for special or private monetary donations, and so none shall be accepted.

And, post collection, if the amount collected is less than the amount required, and if you are able to afford it, it is always good to top up the rest yourself. And if you are not able to, then call upon one member of the family to assist, just mentioning the amount you require. Once the amount is found or collected you could express your happiness and your thanks for collecting the required amount or the amount collected in excess. Where monies have been collected in several currencies it would be the better thing to convert the various to your own currency and announce the amount in one currency, so it would respect the anonymity that you have tried so hard to maintain.